“Letting Our Kids Be Where They Are”
Why do we push, push, push our kids to reach an invisible line we draw?
We of course want our children to thrive and do their best, but when we push them too much, what’s our end-goal?
If we think they’re ahead or behind, what’s the standard? What’s that line we NEED to get them to?
Our kids are at the level where they are because that’s where they are.
It’s not necessarily bad or good, it just is. It might look one way to the world, but to the Lord, it just is.
Drive and determination are big to me, but I’ve also been trying to breathe easier and release that invisible line I draw.
If the frustration or tears arise in our kids, that’s a great time to take a break, a breather, and then see where they are, so we can meet them there.
Right where our kids are, instead of pushing them ahead when they’re not ready.
When we loosen our grip on that line, our kids’ determination might even improve because they’ll be at their own pace and feel more capable.
What are your deepest hopes for your kids?
What matters most?
I want my kids
to have integrity,
to have drive,
to love learning,
to love Jesus,
to love others.
But, to be the best?
To be number one?
To always rise above the next kid?
I’m okay if that’s not the case because my goal for them is not to be “the best”.
What I want to know is
are my children only looking out for themselves or are they considering others?
Are they reaching out to kids who are left out?
Are they serving with love?
That matters deeply to me.
The Scripture that seeps into my mind is Matthew 20:16 when Jesus says, “the last will be first, and the first will be last.”
Those who choose to love and serve others really live.
Are we directing our children toward what matters?
Because at the end of the day, we take none of the temporal things with us.
What lasts are eternal things we’ve invested in.
Yes, instilling drive, perseverance, and diligence is important, but let’s also ask ourselves in parenting our kids, what are we prizing the highest?
If it’s to outshine the next person or to meet a particular standard just because, let’s reevaluate.
Let’s encourage our kids to work hard and do their best with a settling calm of letting them be where they are –
enjoying them right now, in the place they’re in.
As parents, while our kids mimic so much of what we do, let’s notice what we’re seeking after most,
and pursue the things that last…
That’s what I want my kids to invest in.
That’s where the kingdom of God is found.
I love this perspective by Emily Ley. Yes! ❤️
Lord, no matter what’s going on, help us to find peace & joy in You. ❤️